


I Remain Ever Hopeful

by your_local_mook



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel/Dean Winchester One Shot, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Healing, Hurt/Comfort, Injured Castiel (Supernatural), Injury, Injury Recovery, Kissing, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Major Character Injury, One Shot, Short One Shot, Worried Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:27:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24144367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/your_local_mook/pseuds/your_local_mook
Summary: When Cas almost dies on a werewolf hunt, Dean is suddenly reminded of how much he cannot afford to lose the angel.Based on a post about one character tending to the other's wounds, and just as things get tense, someone walks in. Well, that was the initial idea. Idk what happened.
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 4
Kudos: 189





	I Remain Ever Hopeful

**Author's Note:**

> I have a feeling I did too much on this one shot, but that's not exactly a bad thing... is it?
> 
> Please go check out my other works, I'd really appreciate it :)
> 
> Also, sorry for any grammatical errors, it's late, and logically, I should be asleep.

Dean knew that his angel was low on grace, yet even after being told over and over again, he didn't know just how bad it had gotten.

Not until Cas had healed him during a werewolf attack, and in doing so, gotten injured himself.

The panic didn’t start to sink in when Cas screamed, claws raking over and tearing the flesh on his back. No, it sunk in when Dean noticed that blood was pouring out, not grace. The panic worsened when Dean realised Cas wasn’t going to get up on his own, not with those dagger-like teeth sunk into his shoulder. In a state of blinding rage and adrenaline, Dean slaughtered the creature brutally, bloodily, slashing over and over again long after it had died.. He had no time to assess the kind of scene he left. For now, all he cared about was getting Castiel out of there alive.

“Cas? Cas?! Cas, come on buddy, look at me, look at me, come on, that’s it- don’t- don’t close your eyes. Cas, stay with me, stay with me… SAM! SAM, HELP ME!”

\----------

Castiel could feel himself fading in and out of consciousness throughout the car ride back home. Lying on his stomach, he could feel excruciating pain flaring up in his back at every slight bump, every gravelly patch on the road, despite having something pressed against the ragged gashes. The angel’s shoulder fared no better, the entire bite area constantly throbbing with pain. Something warm, sticky, and reeking of iron coated most of his body. Blood. Not a good sign at all. 

At one point, Cas realised that his head was actually on someone’s lap, not the leather seat. A worried voice played at the edge of his consciousness, the familiarity of it bending and wavering like every other input to his senses.

“...Bleeding too much… hospital… grace left?... Make it… have to risk it… Cas?...”

Castiel’s eyes slipped close once more in the moving vehicle.

“Cas, stay with me, buddy.”

\----------

Artificial white lights. Rhythmic beeping. Fresh bed sheets and an antiseptic smell in the air. 

Cas groaned as his senses picked up on everything at once in the strange, yet familiar environment. He tried moving his arm, getting a feel of all the IV lines attached to it, but a sharp pain in his shoulder made him hiss inwardly. Right. Injuries. Cas will have to get used to this, the process of healing slowly.

“Cas?”

Slowly, the angel turned his head to see Dean seated in one of the guest chairs, wiping the remains of sleep drool from his face.

“Hello, Dean,” came the breathy, almost raspy reply. Dean pulled his chair closer so that he was seated right next to the hospital bed, a relieved smile on his face. Gently, he held one of Cas’s hands, and while the angel was not used to this intimate contact from the hunter, he welcomed it nonetheless.

“Hey,” Dean whispered. “How’re you feeling?”

“I’ve been better. What happened on the case?”

“Seriously? You’ve just woken up from surgery, stitches, and blood loss, and that’s the thing you’re worried about?”

“Well forgive me for being curious, and trying to distract myself from the pain.”

“Ass.” Dean chuckled and shook his head. “Dammit, Cas, we were worried. I was worried. I honestly thought…” Dean didn’t let himself finish that thought, and instead looked away for a moment, lips pressed tightly together. “I’m just happy you’re ok.”

Cas’ eyes softened, and a worried wrinkle appeared on his brow.

“You don’t look happy.”

Dean clenched his jaw.

“I should have listened to you. I should- I should have stopped and made sure you were ok, not drag you out hunt after hunt after hunt.”

“Dean-”

“And then you had to go and stick your frigging neck out for me, knowing full well how bad it was. Dammit, Cas, what were you thinking?!”

“I was trying to save your life. A simple thank you would have sufficed.”

Dean ran his free hand over his face. In that one sliding motion, Castiel could see all remaining walls the man had kept up, and he watched them tumble down in a heap. The ghost of devastation covered Dean’s expression, and when he looked at Cas, it was as if Dean’s soul was as bare as when the angel first encountered it back in Hell.

“I can’t thank you if you’re dead.”

Silence. A moment to absorb all the weight behind those simple words.

“I’m sorry,” Cas apologised.

“Don’t be sorry, be careful. Next time you’re faced with that kinda choice, you save yourself, got it?”

“You first.” Cas allowed a hint of a smirk to grace his lips.

“I make no promises,” Dean replied, mirroring that same expression. 

They let the final note of their conversation fade out, bringing in a new wave of content quietness. At first, Dean chose to focus his attention on their still-intertwined hands, which he noted fit perfectly together. However, something inside of the hunter compelled him to look up. He did, only to find Castiel already looking back. As soon as eyes of deep green met eyes of the brightest blue, it was as if the forests of the world met a speckled sky at the horizon. It was at that horizon that both men found a thousand words waiting for them, a thousand thoughts that either could not be spoken or fully formed. In that horizon, they found each other, whole, just as they have always done.

“Cas-”

The door to the room clicked open, and in an instant, Dean had put some distance between himself and the angel, including letting go of his hand. Cas secretly lamented the lost touch, but had to put it aside as Sam walked into the room, a nurse appearing right behind him.

“Hey,” Sam greeted him. “I didn’t know you were awake. How you feeling?”

“I’m functional,” Cas replied. “Does that count?”

Sam chuckled and grabbed another visitor chair, allowing enough room between where he sat and the bed, so that the nurse could carry out their routine checkup. The younger Winchester easily struck up a conversation with Cas, eventually talking about the remains of the werewolf case when the nurse left. As soon as there was a lul in the conversation and Sam looked away, Cas stole a glance at Dean, who had only been piping up with small remarks every now and then, so far. Dean, in turn, flashed him a quick smile. Castiel knew the hunter had something on his mind, but also knew that patience was key. He could wait. He would always wait for Dean. But for now, it was time to recover.

\----------

Dean insisted on staying with Cas at the hospital until he was discharged, despite both Cas and Sam protesting that he was going to be fine. Eventually, Sam relented and went back home to the bunker, taking Baby with him (“Wow, Dean, are you sure? Are you absolutely sure?”), leaving the other two in the hospital ward. Every moment Cas was awake, Dean was by his side, only leaving the angel for food or if the bathroom called. He would only sleep when Cas slept, although there have been a few instances when Castiel had awoken to find Dean deep in slumber. In one of those instances, the hunter’s head was resting on the bed, and it had taken Cas a tremendous amount of self restraint, solely to resist the urge to run his fingers through Dean’s hair. It wasn’t the first time that urge had shown itself.

\----------

When Cas was deemed well enough to be sent back home, Dean was there every step of the way to ensure the angel was alright. At times it was annoying, being treated like a child; Cas would have to repeat himself several times, before Dean would begrudgingly accept that he could take care of himself. However, Cas had to admit that, on the whole, the extra help was welcomed. And needed. Very much needed.

One of the tasks Cas needed help the most with was replacing the dressing on his wounds. He allowed Dean to get into the routine of it without any fuss. Besides, it was almost cathartic watching Dean work, feeling his hands work deftly, even against the sore skin.

Cas found himself relaxing at that touch again one particular night, the two making idle conversation in the light of the angel’s bedroom. Castiel had to toss his trench coat and shirt to the side, leaving his upper body exposed to be worked on. At first it was uncomfortable; he wasn’t used to being so bare, especially under Dean’s watch. Over time, though, they both became more comfortable with it. By the end of Cas’ first week back, all hesitation had vanished. Everything was just so natural and easy around Dean, now more than ever. In a way, it made him glad that he was injured.

“This is gonna sound crazy,” Dean said, having finally removed all the bandages. “But I think these might scar over.”

“Dean, even with my almost nonexistent grace, I am still unable to have scars.”

“But imagine if you did. Think about it, badass angel rocking up to someplace with these awesome scars on your body, and no one can figure out where they’re from. It’s perfect! Really adds to the whole dark, mysterious kind of mood.”

Cas laughed lightly. “Do you really think that of me?”

“Nope. You might be like that to some people, but to me, you’re like this awkward little… I don’t know, puppy, I guess.”

“Hm. Puppies can be adorable, too.”

“Another bonus point.”

It was a good thing that Dean was seated behind him, otherwise, the hunter would have seen a rare blush creeping up Cas’ face.

“Do you think I’m adorable?”

“I- uh…” Dean’s movements faltered. “Well, I never said you weren’t.”

“But do you think so?”

“I don’t know, why do you want to know?” Dean responded, perhaps a bit more harshly than he meant to. He felt Cas’ shoulders slump under his fingertips, heard the dejected tone in his voice.

“I was just curious. Sorry.”

Regretting his own tone, Dean finished dressing Cas’ back and moved in front of him.

“Hey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. If you really wanna know… yes, I think you are adorable. And funny, in your own way. You’ve got a heart so big that sometimes you end up doing the wrong things for the right reasons, and while it pisses me off, it scares me even more. Because I’m afraid, every time, that it’ll be the last mistake you’ll be allowed to make, and the last time I get to see you because of it.”

“Like using my grace to heal you? Is that what you wanted to tell me back in the hospital?”

“Exactly that.”

“And do you think I would have been better off living with myself, knowing I could have saved you? Dean…” Cas didn’t even feel himself reaching forward with one hand to cup Dean’s face. Not until skin met skin, and he was faced with the hunter’s stunned expression. “Surely you must realise by now, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you. Yes, you might snap at me. You might push me away, or hurt me deeply-” Dean winced, “but I would still come back to you. Maybe not in my happiest state, but I’ll always come back. And no matter what, I will always put you before me.”

Dean did nothing. He made no sound, no movement, and if someone were to walk in, they’d have thought him to be a statue. At first Castiel thought that he had made a mistake, but just as he was about to pull his hand away, Dean covered it with his own hand. The hunter closed his eyes and sighed, leaning into the touch.

“I’m sorry,” Dean whispered. “I’m so sorry. I should have known. Cas, why couldn’t I see that?” He opened his eyes again, and Cas could see half formed tears on his bottom eyelid. “All this time, you’ve been letting me take you for granted?”

Cas glanced down, then back up. “I… didn’t think of myself as a priority. Besides, I’m used to it.”

“Cas, you’re my hope. Sam may keep me living, but you’re the one who actually makes feel alive. You’re my priority, and you should never, ever, be so used to having anyone walk all over you like that. Even if- no, especially if that person is me. You’re my hope,” Dean repeated, his hold on Cas’ hand tightening. “I can’t lose you in any way.”

Castiel’s breath caught in his chest. He tried searching Dean’s face for a sliver of a lie, but there was none. Suddenly, all the care he had been given, all times he had been allowed to see Dean at his most vulnerable… it all made sense.

“Can I kiss you?” The words tumbled out of Cas’ mouth, but he wouldn’t have taken them back even if he could.

“Please do.”

Smiling, the angel reached out with his other hand and cupped the other side of Dean’s face, brushing his thumb gently over the hunter’s full lips. Cas glanced up at Dean’s eyes, making sure once more that this was alright, before leaning in closer, ever closer…

Their lips barely touched when a loud knock on the door startled the pair, causing them to jump apart, and causing Cas to wince in slight pain.

“Hey, Cas?” Sam called out from the other side of the door. “Is Dean still with you?”

“Uh…” Cas glanced at Dean, who shrugged. “Yes, he is. Do you need him now?”

“Uh, how busy are you guys?”

“Busy!” Dean cut in before Cas could say anything else. “Really busy! How about you take a hike for five minutes?”

The pair could hear Sam snickering from outside.

“Wow, you finish off that quick?”

“Dude, he’s still healing! Bitch.”

“Jerk. Hey, don’t overexert yourself, five minutes is a long time.”

“Asshat,” Dean mumbled as Sam’s footsteps receded. He turned his attention back to Cas, only to notice the angel’s face was bright red. “Oh. Sorry about that.”

“It’s alright,” Cas replied, surprisingly in a calm manner. “In all honesty, I wouldn’t have minded.”

Dean was stunned for the second time that night. 

“Oh. Wow, ok, um…” He rubbed the back of his head. “Maybe… maybe when you’re better-”

“I’d like that,” Cas interrupted. Despite the embarrassment, he couldn’t stop grinning. “I really would.”

Dean couldn’t stop smiling, or giggling like a school kid. Despite the flutter of butterflies in his stomach, he felt free, almost weightless. In a rush of euphoria, Dean rushed forward and press his lips against Castiel’s, all care in the world gone. 

At first Cas was hesitant, but once the initial surprise wore off, he molded his mouth to Dean’s, eagerly kissing him back. He laced his fingers through Dean’s hair, finally feeling how surprisingly soft it is, while Dean wrapped one arm around the angel’s lower back, and the other hand placed on his waist. Their passion increased as they pulled each other closer, their kisses more heated. Dean couldn’t resist sliding a hand down Cas’ bare chest, and in return, Cas gave the hunter’s hair a small tug, satisfied with the small sound it elicited. He slipped one hand under Dean’s shirt, but was stopped from going any further, as Dean’s gentle hand wrapped around his wrist.

“Whoa, slow down, tiger,” Dean said as he pulled away, almost breathless.

“Sorry,” Cas replied, equally flustered. “I suppose now is not the time to get carried away.”

“No,” Dean chuckled. “Not yet.”

The two sat in silence for a while, foreheads pressed together as they enjoyed each other’s company, and the potential of what’s to come. For once, the future wasn’t so terrifying. In fact, for the first time in years, it was welcomed.

“What are you going to tell Sam?” Castiel asked.

“The truth. Simple as that.”

“And the truth is…?”

“That I’ve been an idiot.” Dean stole another quick kiss. “And that I’m crazy in love with you, Cas. I’m hopelessly in love with a hopeful angel, and there is nothing in the world I would trade that for.”


End file.
